Day 36

Doctrine and Covenants 4:2 (Part two) "..see that ye serve him with all your heart, might, mind and strength..." Remember, this is talking to those who "embark" in the service of God. The words "See that ye serve him.." to me is counsel or direction. If we start to serve our God, we better serve Him in a certain way. If we do not do it as directed, will it be counted service in His eyes, since He was the one who gave Joseph Smith this section?

The cross reference of this first part takes us to Acts 20:19. "Serving the Lord with all humility of mind, and with many tears, and temptations, which befell me by the lying in wait of the Jews.." The apostle Paul was describing the experience he had while serving the Lord. Of course humility of mind is necessary to serve our Lord. If one isn't humble, how can they serve their Lord?

Then he couples humility of mind with tears and temptations. The temptations came because of those unbelieving Jews. They were "Lying in wait."

Now we get into the "heart, might, mind, and strength." How often is this mentioned in our scriptures? If we embark in His service, we had better serve Him with all our souls, with all our abilities, with all our strengths. Or in other words, consider it this way: All our heart, all our might, all our mind, and all our strength. If we couple all our heart and mind, if we combine all our might and strength, that, at least to me, means that IF we start to serve our God, we better do it with everything we have, ALL OUR ABILITIES, nothing held back, for after we are told to serve with everything we have, all abilities we have been given, then we are warned. "...that ye may stand blameless before God at the last day."

In other words, if we start to serve in His work, and we do not give all we have, then I assume by this verse that we will be held accountable, we will be blamed for not giving it all. SO if we embark in His service, we better give all we have to this work, or we shall not be blameless in the last day.

Day 35

Doctrine and Covenants 4:2 - (Part One) Therefore, o ye that embark in the service of God, The word embark means to board a ship or a plane, or it means to begin, to start, to join in a venture. This is a call, or a challenge to those who want to start being involved in this "marvelous work." Or as it states, those who want to start in the "service of God." He is speaking to us. He is speaking to those who want to serve God, or who want to be involved in this marvelous work that is coming forth.

The Service of God can mean many different things. As I imagine about the service of God, I think of Moses 1:39. This is His work and glory, to bring to pass the immortality and Eternal Life of man. The immortality of man has already been taken care of by our Savior. But the Eternal Life of man involved His work. How can we participate this goal.

The service of God can mean the callings we have been called to and set apart in. So, embarking in service means doing our home teaching, visiting teaching, teaching Primary, or Sunday School, etc. It means fulfilling our stewardships in His eyes.

But does it mean more than that? Does it mean serving God? Or serving man in His name? Is there a difference? The following part of this scripture talks about serving God, and how to do it.

So, embarking in the service of God, we are starting our journey in serving God. The reference to this statement to serve God takes us to Acts. It says there: "Serving the Lord with all humility of mind, and with many tears, and temptations..."

I guess serving God is personal. If we want to serve God, then we should decide what, where, and how the Spirit directs us to serve God. But is it beyond our "callings" in the Kingdom? Or is it only referring to serving in the calling we have been called to?

Any service to God, whether through a calling, or on our own inspired direction is to be done in His way. And in the following words, we shall be taught how to serve God, no matter how we have been called, through our own inspiration or through the inspiration of our church leaders.

Day 34

Doctrine and Covenants, Section 4: 1 Now behold, a marvelous work is about to come forth among the children of men. This was received about fourteen months before the organization of the Church 0n April 6. We are just told Joseph Smith reeived this in February, 1829 at Harmony, Penn. It was written to Joseph's father, who was the first Patriarch of the Church.

"Now behold..." This is the way that many sections of the D and C are begun. Now behold, or attention everyone, or listen to what the Savior has to say, etc. Now behold...

"A marvelous work..." If you check out the reference of these words, you will understand that is a very significant statement. A wonderful, marvelous, hard to totally understand, etc. This is a work of the last dispensation on the earth. This is something everyone should hear. This marvelous work (1 Nephi) will be everlasting and help in Eternal Life, or it will be a deliverance down into captivity.

This marvelous work would be the restoration of the fullness of the gospel. This work is "about to come forth.." Father knew that in fourteen months, the church would be restored. He knew the role Joseph would play in this work. This was all determined before the foundations of this earth.

I can imagine the excitement that Father in Heaven must have felt to see finally, after hundreds of years of darkness, the fullness of the gospel was going to be again restored to the earth to benefit all of His children. A marvelous work is coming to everyone. "..is about to come forth among the children of men."

This "work" will either open the eyes of the honest in heart, or it will send those who will not listen to darkness, or continued darkness, for the world existed in darkness for many years before since fall of Christ's church after his advent on earth.

Can you appreciate the need to give this notice to Joseph's father since he was the chosen Patriarch?

If someone you trusted said to you, "get ready, a marvelous work is coming forth on the earth." Wouldn't you be excited?

Day 33`

That number - 33 - is an important one. It is interesting how the Lord does things using the same number. Christ was 33 when He died... Enough about numbers.

I went to the temple yesterday again, and I felt the same feeling of excitement when I was asked to renew my covenant about giving all I have to building the Kingdom and establishing Zion. One friend said once that all I have to do is fulfill the stewardships I have now, not worry about the "more" that I keep feeling and just be satisfied that Father will hold me accountable for the stewardships I have received from the Stake President and the Bishop, and of course being a father, husband, grandfather, brother, etc.

As I pause each morning cleaning my body and mind while the hot water runs over me, I strive to commune with Father. I review in my mind His purposes on this earth, and then question how I can help. Of course, I have been given my own stewardships from local leaders, but I have other stewardships. Rather than seek another one or two or hundred, just take care of what I have been given.

Then my mind flies back to Section 4. I love that section. Perhaps there are hidden truths contained within that I NEED TO KNOW, thus I will try to treat this section in my upcoming writings on this blog. It will be for me, since I feel I am writing for me and no one reads this, but if anyone happens on this, and has anything to say, please do so.

Anyway, I want to study, though reading, discussing this at least with myself, this section. This was given to Joseph's father in February 1829. It was in Harmony, Pennsylvania. It was before the church was officially organized. I will do some research about section 4 and discuss it the next time I get on here. Hopefully soon, for I have much to do in the next few days.

Day 32

I can't believe we are already into December. There is so much good, so much service, loving, compassion, and cheer during this month. It is hard to comprehend that the statistics show that there is also a hike in the suicide rate. It is a time when everyone should be celebrating, but instead because so many are celebrating but for some often small reason they are not, thus they feel to end their misery.

I can't understand it, but can understand it. I know, it sounds like I just blew it, but think about it. I can see how someone can feel like running away from life, from sadness and feeling all is awful, and wanting out, thinking they is no answer. But I can't understand ending it all, hurting so many with your actions... Get it?

Life continues. Mortality continues. Lessons continue. Father continues to teach me lessons. I would assume anyone reading these posts are questions why I say what I say, and what is going on.

I feel as Joseph Smith at times about asking Father, Where art thou? But I hear the answer echoing in my mind all about earning me experience that I need. So I don't dwell on that question too long, and just try to learn lessons. The sooner the better for I know He has the key to my imprisonment.

There is so much good that can be done in this season. So often we do not look beyond our own family, we only consider what our family wants for Christmas, and our beloved ones. What about the strangers, those who are considering ending it all, what about those who have nothing?

I commit that when I leave this house, I will be on the lookout for someone who I may not know, but someone who I can cheer up just with a word, or a smile, etc. I would assume it won't change a thing, but it WILL CHANGE ME. That is most important anyway, is it not?

Day 31

No matter what the trial, the challenge, or the affliction, if we could keep foremost in our minds that our Heavenly Father loves us, that He would never make us go through anything that is not totally required for our "process of perfection" on earth, and if we could only remember that we are so much more important that the Lillies of the Field, that we are His children, and that He is never far away, and that He would gladly answer our every prayer if what we are asking for would not be damaging to His purposes in our behalf, I believe that we could endure, and get through any trial.

The challenge is keeping those thoughts in our minds all the time, especially when we are being blessed with uncomfortable situations and "these things" which gain us experience and growth.

I still believe in miracles and know that there are many awaiting us. If I could learn the lessons I am supposed to learn, then these trials would be removed. Alma and his followers were strengthened by the Spirit so they endured all their afflictions with cheerfulness. I guess that is my challenge. Rather than lose sight of the initial statement in this day's post, I should strive to endure these "blessings" with cheerfulness. For just as in Alma's day, if I would then I feel Father would release us from this experience, just as he did Alma's people.

I love life. I offer gratitude each day for challenges which cause me to either grow, or fail. I hope I am growing, but it is difficult for me to know for my vision is a bid slurred since I am in the middle of it.

I know I have not been concentrating on establishing Zion and building the Kingdom, but they are ever present in my mind and in my life. That is another challenge I should be pursuing, yet just trying to remain on top is taking all my abilities. Perhaps that is what I should be learning, develop more, cope with more, strive more, and grow.

You see I have much to work on.

Day 30

Thanksgiving is almost over. There is so much to be grateful for these days. A dear friend of mine just received her call with her husband to Sinapore. If it wasn't such a sin, I would admit that I am jealous. Bonnie and I certainly hope that a mission or two, or six are some of the things in store for us in the near future. But we shall see, for the Master Director of our lives is busy teaching us other things currently. When you are in the middle of an exam, or a test, often you do not know when you have completed it, nor when it is time to think it should be over, but the Master Teacher is the one who is calling the shots. He decides when to turn on the lights, who should be on stage, turn off the lights, interject something in a certain act of the mortality play that will cause additional lessons or be a redeeming event.

Anyway, we are plugging along.

You can see by my photo I am including, it is the fateful, once a year day when the two rivals of the state gather together to play a crazy game of football. It doesn't mean much this year, they both have the same record, and both will go to bowl games, this is just for bragging rights, but oh the bragging rights that will suddenly appear after the final gun...

Father has chosen not to direct us yet into our coming, new stewardship. I certainly hope that we are moldable clay as He puts His teaching into our soul, hopefully never to be lost.

I have been reading a book that explains the value of listening to the promptings of the Spirit, the "enticings" or whispers. It certainly is helping direct my thoughts and feelings.

Where is my/your mind today? Dwelling on the thorns or the roses? Good thought to keep in my mind all the time.

Day 29

I have heard many people explain how thanksgiving started many years ago. It is wonderful to know, but for me, I am just grateful for the time, the challenge for forget the things I do not have and dwell upon the things I do have.

I challenged a group of young adults the other day to dwell upon gratitude, and quit worry so much about what we don't have. This morning, I decided that I better practice what I preach. Thus I am going to express gratitude for what I have, and express gratitude for the trials and challenges I have been blessed with. For are they not just opportunities to learn, to grow, and become more like my Father?

I feel bad, for yesterday I lost sight of that. I was so concerned about life, what I do not have, what I feel I need, and what is not coming to me, that I was depressed. Those who know me know that my depression is not at all like the depression of the world. It is just that in my quiet moments, I was not dwelling upon the Eternal Nature of things, I was dwelling upon my failures and why I was not blessed as I THOUGHT I SHOULD BE. Sin, Sin, Sin.

So, I have eliminated that self defeating thought from my soul, and today, and for at least the rest of the Thanksgiving week, I am going to dwell upon blessings, even blessings of hardship, for they are truly blessings.

I love my Father, for He knows what is best for me, and especially the timing of when, how and what. I am sure He is frustrated with me when I try to superimpose my timing onto His, when I try to tell Him what is best for me.

So, here's to having me behave better this week, and onward. My moment of depressiong or losing sight of the things that matter was very short, but it was awful, for I listened to the wrong whispers, and chose to ignore those from my Father. REPENTANCE is mine today. Those who happen to read this, please know that I wish you the best of Thankgivings with those you love close at hand, even eating turkey with you. (Save me a piece)

Day 28

If I am not concentrating on Building the Kingdom, it is totally my fault. When things of mortality get in the way, which they do almost every day, every hour, why can't I shed them, for in the Eternal View, they are insignificant.

"The natural man is an enemy to God....; unless he yields to the enticing of the Spirit, putteth off the natural man..."

I have been pondering about this phrase lately. Am I a natural man? Do I listen to the enticings? The promptings? That is what makes me different from the animal kingdom. Thus, how close am I to an animal today?

I would hope that I can continue to change, to perfect myself so I can listen more closely to those enticings, those promptings, for that is how Father directs me.

When I ignore them, when I pass them by as something other than what they are, the next time they are harder to hear. I am afraid that I am not listening as closely as I should thus those promptings still come, but because of me, they come in a different language and I cannot hear them.

How can I pursue His goals for me and mine if I don't listen? That is my goal.

As I write this post, I assume this blog is nothing more than just my journal, a way to share with myself what I am feeling, for it goes out to the world through this blog thing, and who knows what happens. Perhaps there is someone on Kolob, or a closer star that is reading the meanderings of this crazy person and either laughing, or wondering what is in my mind, what I am made of, and perhaps I should assume I am writing to a kindred spirit in another realm, or another Phase of existence. Who knows. Anyway this is enough for day 28.

Day 27

I just finished reading some of Moroni's last words. "God has not ceased to be a God of miracles..." "He changeth not; if so he would cease to be God; and he ceaseth not to be God, and is a God of miracles." The only reason we imagine that he ceaseth to be a God of miracles is because man or we... "...dwindle in unbelief, and depart from the right way and know not the God in whom we trust..."

So often we/I do not recognize miracles. They surround us every day. Ninety percent of the people on earth walk around in a blind stupor, not "seeing" (having eyes but not seeing) the daily miracles and wonders that surround them all day long. The other ten percent walk around in amazement watching and recognizing the miracles of the day.

He is a God of miracles. There are miracles happening every day in my life. We just don't often note them, and pause to give thanks for them. But they are there daily.

When I put on my Eternal Perspective glasses, I can see these miracles happening daily. These glasses filter out the hazards of the day, the commonly accepted sins of the world in this day, and help me be a thankful person, honoring the creator of miracles daily in my life.

As I do this, my aching returns about how I can best Build the Kingdom today, as well as strive to work toward that glorious day when we all shall be taught the principles of the City of Enoch.

There are miracles surrounding me daily.

Day 26

Elder Eyring quoted in a talk given in November 1989 the following: "Not long ago a man asked me, "does your church still believe that when Christ comes you will be living as one, the way they did in the city of Enoch?" He put a spin on the word still as if we might not believe such a thing anymore. I said, Yes we do. And then he said, "you are the people who could do it."

If Elder Eyring is telling others that we, and I believe that included me and you, we STILL believe that when Christ comes, we will be living as one, the way they did in the city of Enoch, then I have to conclude that there better be a people who believe as he does, a people who have been prepared, a people who know what Elder Eyring was talking about well before Christ comes, to be able to live in that kind of society.

So when we commit to give all that we have to building up the Kingdom and establishing Zion, at least the kind of Zion that Enoch built, I guess I have much to do, for I want to be included in that group of people he was referring to.

The small stuff of life, of mortality too often get in the way of that goal. Money, food, employment, house payments, gas prices, Christmas, and other things seem to replace the thoughts of Zion and I subconsciouly place Zion, and building Zion behind these other things, when in reality I perhaps should place them first, and then let "all these things" take care of themselves.

I am sure many would not agree with that point, but I must consider it a bit myself, at least for me and my house, my thoughts, and my feelings.

Day 25

We are all in mortality. Why? Abraham says it is to prove ourselves. Christ says many times that we are to endure to the end. We are also taught to serve others, as in seeking FIRST the Kingdom. Then of course, Father needs someone to work toward building Zion, first within the hearts of brothers and sisters, and then within families, then communities.

So as I look at my life (and I suggest you do the same), I try to figure out what I should be concentrating on. I mean, am I in the middle of proving myself worthy of the Highest degree? Or am I striving to just endure all the opportunities of growth, or trials I have? Then maybe I need to concentrate on serving my fellow man, thus building the Kingdom.

Since I am a bit older these days, since my body keeps yelling in a different region each time I try to use it, I would imagine that perhaps each of us have different parts of that mortality. Are there different periods of our life when we should be just concentrating on enduring? It takes all we have just to endure through trials and learn lessons?

Or should we concentrated on serving others? Do we wake each day trying to think of someone to serve, someone who needs a smile, a cheery joke, a plate of cookies, or what?

Or should I spend my waking time in trying to fulfill my stewardship in a more efficient manner, thus serving better, longer hours, doing more than I have done?

Or should our lives be a compilation of all these things? And if we concentrate on all these things, will we not be able to give each one it's due?

Just pondering, since I seem to have time while waiting for the mirarcles that Father is sending to me one of these days.

Day 24

It certainly is exciting to wait and anticipate what our Father has in store for us this time. We have finished our stewardship in Brigham City and awaiat our next assignment. We know that He brought us up here to do what we have done in the work field. It has benefittted the community, and it was building the Kingdom, but so much more important than that we have learn so many valuable lessons, eternal principles about this stewardship as well as our Eternal Companionship. So, the miracles have been abundant surrounding our stewardship in Brigham City.

But as we continue to analyze our lessons being taught through our time in Northern Utah, I still feel an urge to be Building up the Kingdom. As I have prayed and pondered this, and as I have heard Elder Eyring teach, it is something that should be in our minds constantly.

We can, and should be concerned constantly about ways to keep that idea paramount in our minds. Yes, we have other duties surrounding us, but there should always be time, a mental part of our mind with that concept being generated, so that at any time, day or night, any place, there will be opportunities to build the Kingdom.

Yes, we should be doing that with our families constantly, with each other, with neighbors, and with those in our personal stewardship in our wards and stakes, but there is more to do, if we are listening to the Spirit tell us.

Anyway, that is my "take" on the subject, and perhaps that is only my personal feelings, and no one else feels that.

But since this is my blog, that is my view of this wonderful challenge we have, to constantly daily, and all the time BUILD THE KINGDOM.

Day 23

I have been one of those blind people who could not see the miracles surrounding me. I posted last time that we were waiting for a miracle, and what happens if it didn't happen. Then, when I paused and looked around me, I saw many miracles surrounding me. I was blind to the miracles of God, of my loving Father in Heaven.

Because of the miracles I desired at the time, I was oblivious to those that were happening all around me. I would assume that Father was not too well pleased with me.

Last Sunday, we heard Elder Eyring suggest that we must all be about building the Kingdom, and "all these things" will be added unto us when it was right in His schedule. So, I need to ponder more, see what I can do more about building the Kingdom. Every time I go to the temple, my soul vibrates when we get to the point where I can again promise to give all I have to build the Kingdom AND establish Zion.

I know that is the title, that is the main reason I started writing on this blog, about the privilege many of us will have to build the Kingdom, and establish the Zion that will greet the inhabitants of Enoch's city when they return.

So often pressing matters, or in other words, other things like bills, kid problems, employment challenges, neighbors, other responsibilities get in the way of considering how we can build the Kingdom daily, as well as having the goal of Zion in our hearts, and thus at least thinking about what a wonderful time that will be.

I need to watch for, recognize, and give thanks for each miracle that comes into my life daily, for I know there are many each day, most of which I ignore, or accept without giving thanks.

Mosiah teaches that even the air that we breath is a gift from God. Do I act that way? Much to do in my own personal life of late. Better repent and become better, huh?

Day 22

As we mentioned in day 20, we were waiting for a miracle. What is it when that miracle fails to materialize? A nightmare? An undigested potato?

So often in life we analyze things, events, happenings, and inspirations? that just seem to go away, that don't mean anything. Then we pause to consider reasoning. We are left with nothing, wondering the why's of things. We better learn lessons, but when there doesn't seem to be any to learn?

I am reminded of the old testament scripture that says that we don't see as Father sees. We judge, try to understand, but with imperfect sight, and then we give up, again asking that three letter word, why?

When I pause to try and understand or learn lessons that events are trying to teach me, and come up wanting, then I must recall 2 Nephi 2:24 which says that all things have been done in His wisdom. If that is true, then since I don't see as He does, and since I don't know where to turn, I better rest on the Eternal Truth that He does truly love me as His son and He won't let me go through anything that is NOT for my benefit.

In the LDS play My Turn on Earth, there were often times when little telegrams, or little notes of direction from our Father would come floating down from the heavens. I guess I am looking for one of those right now. How can I pursue when I don't know where nor what to pursue?

Oh well, isn't life wonderful?

Day 21

It is interesting as we await miracles to happen in our life together. I have been "told" by Him who knows all, that lessons are being taught, learned, and there are struggles that are delaying it. I know Father knows what is best for all involved.

So many times in my short life :) I have witnessed the desire to do good, or our struggles with patience, or there are a myriad of other things that we don't totally appreciate, which get in the way of Eternal Lessons that Father is teaching. In my opinion, that is why He does not bless us, often, with things we THINK we need, because we would dash out and destroy lessons He is teaching to our family, to loved ones, etc.

So as we wait, learn lessons, try to exercise faith in His control of all things, try to understand the reasoning behind some things that do happen and some things that do not happen, He is teaching, loving, and showing that love if we can only recognize it, feel it and know it to be there.

Miracles happen all the time. We just have to "see" them, through the tangled mess that Satan puts in front of us.

Day 20

Bonnie and I are waiting for the conclusion of a miracle. It has half happened, but the final leg of it is yet to be decided, or secured, or whatever.

We were told of an individual going to the temple and sharing with a temple worker that he was just laid off and was unemployed. The temple worker said, "Congratulations. Now you will be so excited to see what Father has in store for you. Aren't you just overjoyed?"

That is not usually the way one treats unemployment. Hope and excitement is not how one comes home from work and shares with his wife about being let go. Instead of bringing home the steak to celebrate, he comes home with a lower lip dragging on the floor, wondering what is going to happen next, wondering if they will have enough money to pay their bills, wondering how they can get work when no one else is getting hired.

Unemployment is such a challenge. It is a challenge between spouses in communication, in different roles, and in "discussion" about it. It is a challenge of having sufficient faith to get through the difficult moments when all seems to be lost. It is a struggle to wonder what Father will have us go through before we are counted worthy for that miracle where we can find work and be gainfully employed again. It is a trial of faith, joy, hope, and patience.

Bonnie and I are waiting for either an extension of our blessing of unemployment and the trial of paying our bills, or a temporary relief of at least two months, and perhaps for a LONG time.

I treated miracles in this blog once before. I asked if it was correct to ask for a miracle. Since there is a dearth of anyone commenting on my comments, I just imagine what anyone else would say. And of course, I must imagine that everyone agrees with me, since I am so enlightened and wise.

I pace around the house waiting to see what comes next. Today, or at least by tomorrow we shall have either that miracle, or we shall have to run around and start over to find employment, income sufficient for our needs and paying our bills.

So tonight is a 'hurry up and wait' time in our lives. The kids have been praying, fasting, and pleading. But only Father knows, at least right now.

Am I up to another period of trial. Tough question, since I felt I was directed at this one. Now what? Was it just for trials to teach?

I love my Father, no matter what He sends our way. We shall cope, learn, and grow.

Day 19

What does "Giving all that we have" for the purpose of building up the kingdom mean? I have often thought of that. If I pause to count the blessings I have, if I start to list all the things I have been blessed with, if I view each item that I have been given as a blessing, will I give it all up? If I look at my house, which I do not own, but some banks owns, would I give that up if it were required of me for the purpose of building the Kingdom?

In the early days of this dispensation, many gave up their lives for the Kingdom. Many gave up homes for the Kingdom. Many gave up loved ones and all possessions for the Kingdom.

What are we to give up in todays life for the Kingdom?

I sort of figure that there is not much required of us to give up. But perhaps "giving up" things is not what is means. The word used is "consecration." Concentration is much different than giving up something.

Does concentration mean dedication? If I concentrate my home to the Kingdom, or to esbalishing Zion, what does that mean? Or are we to do that? Am I grasping at straws?

If I concentrate my time to the Kingdom, what does that mean? If I concentrate my money to the Kingdom, what does that mean?

The Law of Concentration is where we "give up" or present to the bishop all that we have, receive back from him according to our needs, and whatever is left over is "given" to someone else who may need it.

We are not required to live this law, but eventually we will be, right?

This blog today is to get your mind working, thinking, and commenting. I seek answers, not arguments. If you have a comment, or 2 cents worth, so state.

Day 18

One dear friend said that when Enoch comes with his city to greet those still on earth, they will fall on our necks, according to the scriptures, and it will be too late to START preparing to live in a society of Zion, as they do every day.

I agree. I feel that there needs to be preparation to be ready. Don't know what, where, and when, but that is what I feel.

Building Zion involves doing what the Spirit whispers to us through our hearts. Building Zion involves seeking out opportunities to build others, serve others, strengthening our families. It involves serving with all our hearts, souls, minds, and strength. It involves knowing that there is more than just obedience to the laws and commandments. It is going further, stepping beyond the "required" and letting the Spirit be our guide.

For I KNOW that there is a place beyond obedience, where the Spirit takes control of our mental, and directs us in Father's ways, doing more than what is expected of us.

I ponder of many brothers and sisters I have met throughout my long life who fit this definition. They are examples to me, of what I want to become. I must take more time to analyze why they are as they are, or better yet, why they influence me as they do.

Confession: Since my life is so up in the air, my ramblings here are what SHOULD be done, not what I am doing, since I am just trying to make it from day to day until I know His will about our future. Is that an excuse? Yes, I guess it is. No matter what the circumstances in our lives, we should be seeking out "building" and "establishing", at least in my opinion.

Thanks to the dear friend who commented on the post I place about some people wanting more and seeking more than just obedience. I agree, so I seek. Will let you know when I find it.

Again, thanks for reading and commenting, for that is how we learn from each other.

Day 17

I was told that one person requests that anyone who comments to me, should comment on this blog, thus inciting discussion. When I am holding a discussion by myself, it gets sort of boring. But I continue.

As I my future, these days, is up in the air, and what I will be doing with my time is not set, nor decided, as we offer ourselves, our talents, and our testimonies to the Lord, as we pursue everything trying to decide what HIS will in on our lives, I can't help but imagine how wonderful it would be to serve FULL TIME in His service. We have the desires, but it is up to His desires for us.

We know that He is teaching us, preparing us and permitting us to experience many things to Celestialize us while in mortality, or at least make a few brush strokes in our character for OUR BENEFIT, I must be patient.

My older sister told me once that everything we do in this life is working for the Kingdom, or the Church. Everything we do, everything say and serve, is building the Kingdom. Thus, whatever He puts in our path, whatever we do, go, or be is totally up to Him if we listen correctly and follow those divine whispers.

So, again, we are in a holding pattern. We plead, pray, and try to listen to His direction, thus bringing to pass His will in our lives.

No matter what, where, we will be building the Kingdom in our own little way, according to His plans. Right?

Day 16

A friend of mine commented that I should change my statement about a Zion society being established on earth before Christ comes. I appreciate his comments, however, I remain in my statement. If Enoch and his city comes and falls upon our necks and we upon theirs, we must be able to live the same state, the same Terrestrial condition they live with, we must have a people ready to receive them, understand them, and live with them in the same "state."

I don't pretend to want to create a Enoch's city, I do feel that there needs to be much work done in the hearts of members of this church to prepare them for that coming bliss with Enoch does return.

Just as tithing, fast offering, etc, prepares us to rid ourselves of the love of money, prepares us to live the law of consecration, where we will give all we have to the Lord, not just 10% and not just what we feel we can to Fast Offering, the same way there needs to be things done, and probably most often things done within the walls of our own heart to prepare ourselves to be ready for Enoch's return.

Yes, I believe my good friend is right, but I feel strongly that I am too. We must think about, prepare for, and question how each of us can improve to be ready when Enoch returns. Perhaps I am wrong to try and think that this is something that I can do anything about, but time will tell, Spirit still whispers to my soul that this is a good cause, a good goal, and if it is just for me to get better, closer to that situation, so be it.

I feel there are many "card carrying" members who attend the temple, do all they feel they need to do, magnify their callings, meet all the covenants they have made, yet feel there is MORE. They are the ones that Father is calling in their silent times, in their inspiration times that they need to help prepare for Enoch's return.

Anyway, that is my vision. There are hundreds, thousands, many, many who feel that way, and do all they can do within their own location of residence, but want more. What is that more? I told you my thoughts, now you think in your mind what are yours?

If one was to ask Father what more they could do in the Kingdom than they are doing, what would He say? Is there a point where we are doing all we can, should do? Consider the Three Nephites, and even John. They wanted to do more than the others. There is always more to do in the Kingdom of God and part of that is thinking about and trying to become close to that state.

I guess I have expressed my thoughts enough on that subject.

Day 15

I have been taking this time to review my thoughts and feelings about the counsel from the General Conference we just completed. What a wonderful source of inspiration from His disciples. What a wonderful day we live in, where we can get inspiration from our leaders constantly. I wonder how often the saints of yesteryear enjoyed counsel and direction from their prophets?

I remember one of the brethren telling us that at dinner table each night (please remember that I am old and am paraphrasing and probably doing that not quite perfectly) they discussed who they served that day. It was a challenge to serve someone different each day.

I thought what a wonderful idea. If we had a daily time when we were to report, or be held accountable to goals we have set, it would motivate us to make sure we did it. When we report our home teaching each month, (or visiting teaching) we know that by the end of the month we shall be held accountable. I wonder how much of it would not get done if we didn't have that time deadline to report. (The principle of reporting is another topic that could be treated, commented on in this place, but we shall see later...)

Back to my train of thought. What is we paused each day at dinner (and that is assuming that we pause each day to eat at a dinner table) and report how we built up the Kingdom today? I would propose that serving someone is building the Kingdom. It builds he whom you serve as well as the server.

Just for this blog's purposes, let us have a definition for a moment.

Kingdom Of God: According to Bruce R. McConkie, and that is the definition I am using, the Kingdom of God is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints today.

Zion: Zion, at least in MY blog, is the condition that existed during the days of Enoch. Sure it is the pure in heart, but it also defines the condition of the City of Enoch, which I feel strongly will be established on earth before Christ returns.

So, since this is my blog, I assume these two definitions of these two goals, dreams, visions I have and that is the purpose of this blog.

Now to conclude for today, I think if I set a time each day when I report, at least to my Father in Heaven, if no one else, what effort I have made to build the Kingdom, thus building me, that would be a good goal to honor. No?

One additional item. I have a dear sister who often reads this blog, but does not feel comfortable adding comments. Please dear friend, do not feel embarrassed or worried that your words will not be received and accepted. I am just an individual using this medium to share thoughts and learn. The more who share their thoughts and ideas, the more I learn and progress toward these two goals, visions.

Thanks again for reading, I shall continue...

Day 14

Reviewing the conference messages, I pause and try to commune with the infinite. I know there are lessons I need to learn, how to become more servicable, how to serve more, and how to build the Kingdom. I know there are lessons He is teaching me even as I type my feelings on this page.

Bonnie and I have discussed how challenging it is not to know our future. Throughout life, most people have an idea what is coming tomorrow, next week, next month, and so on. It is good to plan, save, and prepare for the future. But right now, we have no idea what will be coming into our lives.

We want to serve a mission, but Father must sanction that decision. However there are things that have to happen to permit that, and if He decides that now is not the time, then I must figure out what is next for us.

I seek a miracle. Is that bad? I could write you the scene, the happening of this miracle. I could tell you how it will happen. I could envision how everything will work out the way I want it to. But, that is now how it is to be done.

I guess, throughout my life, Father has tried and tried again to teach me patience, faith, and endurance. Guess this is another time to work on learning these Eternal Principles.

Yes, I still want to be involved in Building the Kingdom as well as Establishing Zion. But my daily live, as well as the expectations of life and others must be established and set.

Anyone who reads this blog will know that I am just sort of floating, unsettled, and awaiting direction. Sorry about that.

Sorry about straying from my main purpose of writing in this blog about Zion and the Kingdom. My life will be settled within the next few millenia, I promise.

Day 13

I was totally impressed with the talks with the brethren, as well as those wonderful sisters in conference. I noted three main subject in conference. ONE: The incomprehensible, all powerful love our Father has for each of us. TWO: The undeniable fact that many of us are going through difficult trials currently, but shall all overcome in His due time. THREE: Service is often the best way ALL of us can work on building the Kingdom no matter where we are, what we are doing, what we are struggling with, no matter what.

I don't know if I will ever forget the powerful moments listening to Elder Jeffry Holland about the truthfullness of the Book of Mormon, his desire to attach his name next to Joseph's and Hyrum's and everyone needs to know he feels the same way about that wonderful book.

Of course the teachings of the Prophet are always near and dear to my heart. His daughter, who is always smiling gave a wonderful challenge to use safety equipment throughout our lives, no matter even if we don't feel it is necessary.

I can't wait to re read their talks, feel the same feelings I felt as I heard their testimonies, and again search for evidences of counsel to build the Kingdom, and even to establish a Zion today.

This morning Bonnie and I went for a walk and "processed" our feelings, our insights, and it was a joy to hear her thoughts, combined with mine. What a special thing to do after conference between husband and wife.

I am filled with many ways to pursue the dreams and visions I have been given, especially in building the Kingdom.

If any want to add their thoughts about conference, please feel free to do so.

Day 12

What a joyous day, when we are privileged to hear apostles and prophets direct us as to Our Savior's will, wishes, and how we should live our lives through the next six months. I hope everyone listens and learns, and follows direction and our leaders and hears the blessings we will receive. (Those who have ears do not hear?) Is that us?

Day 11

The most important, strongest felt vision and dream I have had, and still hold dear is to help in building up the Kingdom of God, and helping to establish the conditions in everyone's heart to be capable, and desirous of living in a Zion, just like Enoch's City. I understand that I must first build up myself, be prepared, and be ready. But I feel there is so much more for me to do in these two goals.

For the last five and one half years, Bonnie and I have been building up the Kingdom in a different, unique way. We were "called" to Brigham City to improve, clean-up, and present to the community a place where the local residents could create wholesome recreational family activities. We have learned many lessons in doing so. But it is time to pursue our next "mission" assignment from our Father.

We have felt strongly that it was time to prepare, and offer our willingness to go anywhere, serve anywhere, and do whatever the Master desires of us. As of today, October 1, we are through with our assignment in Brigham City. Now what? (this is in and of itself a miracle, to put us into a position where we are available to our Father to do whatever He dictates)

We feel strongly the principles we sing in "I'll go where you want me to go..." We have listed our home for sale. We have no source of income. We are putting ourselves in His hands to direct us wherever He would like us to go, do whatever He wants us to do, and of course say whatever He desires that we say.

No matter where we go, what we are called to do, HOW we do it should be building up the Kingdom. Creating what we did in Brigham was a unique way to build the Kingdom. I wonder where, and what will be our next call to build the Kingdom. As long as we are ready and willing to go anywhere, do anything, I am sure Father will dictate where we can best serve Him, and how we can best serve Him. Are we prepared? I hope so.

So, now, today, as we ponder, it is difficult to prepare for our next stewardship because it could be anywhere, even another bowling alley to clean up.

We continually express to our Father we are willing. I know that he can direct us, and even prepare the way so we can serve in another way to build the Kingdom.

Side note: Those at the bowling alley who have assumed our position, they are telling everyone that we have retired. I wonder if it is possible to retire without having any money to live on? I guess if it is in His will, we are retired, broke, but retired. Perhaps we are tired, not retired. Or perhaps we are retarded, not retired, but certainly tired.

Guess time will tell what becomes of us in the future. Stay tuned, for I am still going to express my goals, visions of building the Kingdom and establishing a Zion. Thanks for reading...

Day 10

I wanted to discuss with you the importance of having pure desires of the heart. But as I have sought out noting the miracles of this day, it became apparent to me that you have to be in tune to see and recognize miracles of each day. I awoke to snow on the mountains this morning. It was cold. Rather than seek out miracles, I just thought how cold it was and how we have not had any autumn. I worried that it may turn to winter without the calm, peaceful, wonderful fall we are used to. I went to work, wondering what was going to become of me and how I was going to continue on.

In other words, I let the "stuff" of the day make me blind and I did not see, or notice the miracles that Father put into my path. Then since I was supposed to note miracles through the day, I thought about it, but saw none.

Then I started thinking if it would be right in His eyes to request miracles? I mean those sick of Spirit or body approached Christ and knew that if they touched Him, they would be healed. Is that possible in these Latter Days?

I know we can't seek to "touch" our Savior, but if we have the faith, can we decide upon a miracle we desire and then ask for it? Rather than go looking for miracles in our day, perhaps we are supposed to ask Him for the miracles we feel we need.

Is it wrong to ask for a miracle of some sort? Or do miracles come only when He decides we need it?

He is a God of Miracles. By faith is a miracle wrought. "A beneficial event brought about divine power that mortals do not understand.." So, is it wrong to ask for a miracle?

We recently listed our home. The reasons are not important, but the challenge we will have can be listed. The economy is awful. There are three on our tiny cul-de-sac that are for sale. No one has any money. So, the miracle I ask for is the selling of my home. It truly would be a miracle to have someone purchase this home so we could serve a mission together. So, I will ask Father for this miracle. Do I have faith it will happen?

Ponder for a moment the correctness of asking for a certain miracles. Is it wrong?

The science of miracles. Teach me, give me your input. Since there seems to be only one folllower of this blog, perhaps she can teach me?

Day 9

A dear sister of mine shared with me that she taught about miracles yesterday. She shared with me her lesson and how she felt it influenced those sisters who were in attendance. I listened and learned from her testimony, from what she shared with me about miracles. She presented a masterfully prepared overview of what Christ taught about miracles and then promised that if we are observant, we will see miracles surrounding us each and every day.

As I ponder about the lessons I have learned from her, I feel she spent hours and hours, prayers, and much effort in her preparation. She BUILT the Kingdom in her small way on Sunday, sharing with others her views, and those things the Spirit taught her.

Isn't that what we covenant to do in the temple? Shouldn't we all seek opportunities to do the same. If we have a stewardship to build the Kingdom by teaching, great. But what if we don't? Then how do we build the Kingdom and fulfill our duties?

Teaching is one great way to build the Kingdom. But there are so many other ways to build the Kingdom. That is what I want to research and learn about. How do I build the Kingdom daily? How do I make a difference in the Kingdom? Do I fulfill that duty by studying the scriptures? Do I do that by loving my fellow man? Please share with me what your thoughts are on building the kingdom.

This sweet sister certainly did yesterday. Did I? Did I strive to build the Kingdom today? Will I tomorrow? Is it something we should dwell upon and work toward daily?

I feel that no matter our stewardship or our callings in the Sunday Church, we can build the kingdom every day. We should strive to build it every day, some how. Won't the Spirit whisper to us, if we only listen, what we could, should do?

If I remember, and I am certainly so very old, I want to discuss about the desires of the heart the next time I write in this Blog. That is something else I have learned recently.

Day 8

Elder McConkie said that one of the three definitions of "the Kingdom" is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints on earth in these days. When we agree to build up the Kingdom, I guess I would like to understand exactly what the Kingdom is, with reference to the Church we all belong to.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has been established for the last time through Joseph Smith. It is for the benefit of all the Saints of God, those currently within the church through baptism as well as those who are His "chosen" who "know" his voice. (those are whom the missionaries are seeking to find) I feel honored to be a part of His Kingdom. It will not fail. I can't help but be reminded of Brother Joseph who said that, "No unhallowed hand can stop the work from progressing..."

A few years ago in conference, one of the brethren stated that the Kingdom is like a train. It is moving forward at a high speed. Once in a while some of us members get off the train due to our misdeeds. The train goes forward with or without us. It is then our duty to get back on the train through repentance. I love the symbology of the train being a fast moving train.

So when we think about building up the Kingdom, I would propose that means that we work with those in our own boxcar rumbling along the train tracks of life. We strengthen the weary, the hands that hang down, the eyes that are wet with tears, those with sore knees who need a smile or a hug, those who mourn or secretly ache with heavy trials but while in church on Sunday, they reply that all is well.

Building the Kingdom, to me, just means that we seek out opportunities to serve, to give, to love, to cheer-up, to thank, to go beyond our comfort zone, to offer hope to those who are facing heavy trials, etc.

Building the Kingdom is just being a giving, loving, caring, compassionate person. It means that I need to quit worrying about my unclear future, my own trials, my own prison cell, my own "opportunities of growth" and lose myself in the service of others, helping them cope, learn, and grow. (it is amazing when I do so, my own trials are of such little importance, and I can cope easier with them...)

Since we are reminded of that continuously, I should take that to heart, learn to live by faith, forget my own challenging blessings, and always seek for someone to uplift.

I worked with a soul once who said that the main part of his early morning prayer was asking Father whom he could serve that day, even at the expense of his own plans. Then he told of stories, miracles, blessings, etc that he had received through the years.

I guess the lesson from this that I learn is that I should be more aware of others, more concerned how I can be an "angel" for someone else as the brethren spoke about in the last conference. It is a constant need, thus I have miles to go before I can rest, and by thus doing, I probably won't want to rest for I will be so involved with building the Kingdom I will make it a habit, not a seldom thought of event.

The Kingdom-Train moves forward at a fast pace. I want to be involved with this train. But it is totally up to me. What makes me joyous? What makes me happy? What fills me with Spirit? Do I feel Perfect Brightness of Hope? If not, why not?

Day 7

Elder Bruce R. McConkie said, "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints as it is now constituted is the Kingdom of Go on earth.... The Church and the kingdom are one and the same." Elder McConkie also said that the Kingdom will continue through the millennium, but in that day it will be both an ecclesiastical and political kingdom. Thirdly, he said that the kingdom of God is also referred to the Celestial Kingdom.

So when we commit ourselves to build the Kingdom of God, what are we promising? Are we promisinig to build up the church? I can't see any other explanation, can you? We promise to "build up" the church. Of course that means making sure that we are the best members we can be. We obey the commandments, fulfill our stewardships. And we even go further than that. Is that enough?

As I commented in Day 6, often I feel there is so much more I can do. When I am going beyond my stewardship, that which I feel is required, that is when I feel the sweet Spirit of confirmation that I am approaching fulfilling this convenant. Now please understand I am only talking for Bill Partridge and how I feel about fulfilling this covenant. You see, when I write these words, since I do not know if anyone else reads it, thus I am just pontificating (is that a word) or just plain expressing feelings that are only about me.

Another "whispering of the Spirit" tells me that we are all in different stations, conditions in this life about where we are. Those with young kids, those with no kids, those with no spouse, etc, all are and should be looking at these promises we make in different eyes. I am just sharing what I feel, what the sweet whispers tell me as I am thinking about, pondering how I can "lengthen my stride" in doing the things I should be doing.

Now if I am to be doing something, it doesn't mean that everyone is in the same condition I am, I am just blubblering. If anyone what to share, comment on my blubbering, then that can help open my eyes, help me learn and grow toward what I need to become.

So my blog, my ponderings, my insights are to awaken in myself (or anyone else who happens to read these words) the moments of thought that I receive while I am alone thinking and communing.

Will continue with day 8 in a few days. Thanks for reading, I guess...

Day 6

Though few have commented on my ramblings, one friend commented that the first goal of my "building the Kingdom" should be building myself, then my wife, then my family. I do agree that building myself, getting more in tune with the Holy Ghost, becoming more serviceable, and just plain drawing closer the way I should live should be number one in my visions and dreams. Then working with my wife on this goal. I do agree.



In fact, not to pat myself on the back, nor to say I have reached that yet, but in my days of service in "the Kingdom" I have noted that many people are struggling with that very idea, to be worthy of the Holy Ghost, to live the gospel, and to feel good about their lives. This is not to say that I feel good about my life, I still need much to be done, much to improve on, much to draw closer to the Spirit.

However, at least in my mind and heart, I feel that I must seek beyond my own petty trials, my own struggles, and my efforts to earn the HIGH REWARD from Father. I, at least me, just me and myself, I feel that to draw closer to the Spirit, to become where we all must arrive, I must do more than just try myself. I must put into practice the principle, "... when ye have done it unto the least of these...." I guess that is the main reason for this blog, is to get me thinking, pausing, considering, pondering, and trying to decide what I MUST DO to perfect myself first, as I have been counselled. THEN help others.

I am just trying to say that I feel the way to help, at least me, become more perfect is to work on helping others, for in service, and in thinking about building the Kingdom, in thinking about Zion, in studying the precepts of Zion, in drawing closer to this way of life, I can be better, become better, and along the way perhaps help someone else.

Not the extend to perfecting anyone else. No, that is their challenge. But I figure if I extend myself beyond my comfort zone by teaching, writing in this blog, by encouraging others, first I am helping myself become that way, the "AS IF" principle. Then if I can serve someone else, then the Spirit accompanies that learning I am doing.

You see, I love and try to follow Elder Hollands counsel in 1985 when he said, "We must take every opportunity to learn and to grow" -- and I figure that is what I am doing by serving, thinking about Zion and the Kingdom. to continue with Elder Holland ".. to dream dreams and see visions, and work toward their realization" and that is what I am doing, dreaming dreams about Zion, and seeing visions about what should be, what can be, and trying to help create that Zion, continuing ".. rest on our swords for a time if necessary, then get up and start fighting again..." That is my goal. I dream dreams often, can envision what Zion should be like, how I need to build the Kingdom in my own way, and work toward these ideals.

Well, enough for today, day 6. Thanks for your comments, for it gets me to read, to evaluate my own feelings as well as yours.

Day 5

Today is Saturday. As I paused before I started this day, I evaluated HOW I was going to build the Kingdom today. What can I do to strengthen the Kingdom, more that I do every other Saturday. In my many, many Saturdays gone by, there are certain things that I end up doing. Will today be different? What am I going to do to build up the Kingdom, at least in my own mind, let alone in the mind of someone else?

The Kingdom is: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I will think about, continue preparing my talk for tomorrow, for since I am a High Councilman, I will be talking in another ward. I have thought of a few things I can do to strengthen, help another family that isn't expecting it. I will continue to strengthen the relationship between myself and my eternal companion. I will continue to strive to be inspired by Father what I should be doing to prepare for our unknown future and the changes that are coming. I will try to build up a stranger that I meet this day, no matter who or where they are. I will contact someone from my past that I have not talked to for quite a time and express love and interest.

If I pause each day and commit to go beyond the casual, every day events that I have been doing each day for hundreds of days, then perhaps that will be building the Kingdom.

If I am willing, shouldn't I be doing something of my own free will without waiting for an assignment from my leaders? That scripture in section four about having desires? If I have desires, then I should be "anxiously engaged" of my own free will and choice. If I pray to be led to someone who needs a smile, a call, or just a "hello" that is also building the Kingdom and trying to get them to feel the principle of love and charity.

Guess I better get going and stop typing away here. Perhaps you should do the same thing. Let's make commitments each day as we start the day to uplift someone else. Deal?

Day 4 and 1/2

NEWS FLASH: I just talked to Bonnie, and she agrees. I have seldom, if ever been content. But then we discussed whether that was a good thing or a bad thing. Guess we will have to evaluate it today in our activities, and wait for others to help decide...

Day 4

I have been accused, lovingly, by a friend that I am never content. In thirty years, he feels that I have seldom... been content. So, that creates in my mind what is contentment? Why would someone who knows me well mention such a thing? Am I not content?

What is contentment? I would propose that contentment is being satisfied with who you are, what you are, and where you are.

Am I satisfied with who or what I am? At times. Other times I realize how I could, and should be a better father, better husband, better servant, just better. So I guess I am not totally content at who I am and what I am.

Am I content with where I am? Not really. I get this feeling that I am still waiting... For what? I don't know, it is just a feeling.

Now, back to the reason for this blog. My dear friend says that my lack of contentment oozes out of what I write on this blog. I guess it does. It is hard to hide how one feels when he is writing feelings and thoughts of the heart. I do feel a desire, a need, an urge to work toward that wonderful condition that was enjoyed by Enoch in his Zion. Perhaps it is just me. Perhaps it is just something that effects me and no one else. My vision that many people feel the same as I do, is possibly in error, and no one feels as I do.

But while I long for that sociality, that charity felt between everyone involved, that condition of love and caring between everyone, I shall continue to be, I guess, discontented.

When I study the scriptures, I read many times when this condition existed. Since the people on earth now are destined to help usher in the millennium, I just figured that there are many who feel the same way, many who are seeking this condition, many who quietly desire to be involved, for it will indeed exist once again, according to the words of the prophets.

So, am I content, or not? Is writing this blog about strengthening the Kingdom and establishing Zion just expressing my desire for something I cannot have? Should I be content on this day of my birth, be grateful for what I have, thoroughly enjoy what is given to me and quit seeking more?

I appreciate my dear friend for opening my eyes to what contentment is and making me think about it. Through thirty years in knowing him I have never been content. But that brings up another subject. Are there people in this life (like me) who are always seeking to become better, find a better life, create more joy with others, climb a higher mountain, serve more people, read more scriptures and just be MORE? Or should we be content in what we have been given, and thankful for it, quit seeking the end of the rainbow, and smile?

That is a question I invite anyone who happens to read this to comment on, for I am pondering this day what I am to learn from this experience. Am I content? Should I be?

Day 3

Since changes are coming into my life in the coming days, and since I have been places where I am reminded of my "duties", I can't help but think of these promises I have made with my

Eternal Parents. D. and C. section:4 states that if you have desires, you are called to the work. I am trying to figure that one out. Father knows of my desires. What does it mean to be called? Have I been fulfilling a "calling" the past five years in Brigham City? What does "the work" mean?

With my thoughts about being called, having desires, and being "willing" to give all I have to build up Zion and work on strengthening the Kingdom, I only can do what I can do. I must make the correct decision so my Savior (Left) can indeed come in and sup with us. I must hear His knock, what His knock means, and how I can open my ears, my heart, and know what he is asking of me.

You see, with my house on the market to sell, with my employment which ended about two months ago, with desires being mixed with being called according to the scriptures, with searching where to search for gainful employment, or investigating the option of serving full time as a missionary, all these things weigh heavily on my mind.

But deep within, I KNOW HE IS AWARE of our hearts, our testimony, and our willingness to go, serve, and be whatever, or wherever He desires. He just must show me where to go.

No matter where we end up, we will be remembering the challenge, the willingness of giving all we have to Him. I know we are not required to do that now, but how we treat "things" and "stuff" about which we will certainly be judged.

I appreciate opinions expressed by anyone who has two cents, or even a dimes worth of comments. I won't promise to agree, but it opens my eyes to different ways of thinking. Thanks.

Day Two

I guess I should consider that the first covenant we make is we must give ALL THAT WE HAVE or will have to building up the Kingdom. I often wonder what it means, "All that we have, or will have" to build up the Kingdom.

So, if we give all we have; time, talents, money, possessions, blessings, etc to build up the Kingdom, does that mean we use our time 100% of each day to build up the Kingdom? Do we strive to strengthen the wards and stakes where we live? Should we forget the things of this world to build up the Kingdom? Or are the things of this world part of the Kingdom? Is my job part of the Kingdom? When I use my money to go to a movie, am I forgetting to us that to build up the Kingdom? How do I build up the Kingdom? Should that be part of my thought process every day?

Or as I struggle to just get through each day without giving up, without screaming UNCLE, without killing someone, should I assume that I am building the Kingdom by NOT killing one of my employees or kids?

It is a challenge. What does that mean when I say I will build up the Kingdom? Is it easy or hard? Do I need to do more than I am doing?

A few years ago, the Brethren asked us to pray to open the nations to missionary work. If praying enough? Is desire enough? If our days are spent just barely coping with the trials we have, is that building the Kingdom? Should be do more? Can we do more?

That is a subject that is up for debate. My older sister said once that every minute I spend at work, I am building the Kingdom for I am doing what is necessary to build my family which isp art of the Kingdom. As I go to work each day, my wife says that I am building the Kingdom, through the hours at work do not involve preaching the gospel, nor saving a soul, at least as for as I can see.

Then, as we commit to build the Kingdom is that a commitment to do only as time allows, or as life permits, or as circumstances let me?

Another Dream and Vision

Day 1

It is time again to begin pursuing Zion. It is a goal I have had for a long time, and yet there are so many times when it seems so far from my mind. So to begin, I am going to commit to write on this blog for 100 days, starting today September 15, 2009. I don't know if I will be able to write every day, but it will be constantly on my mind, and hopefully I will be able to share my thoughts on this covenant we all make in the temple.

All are invited to share, comment, and disagree or agree. But whether anyone does or not, I just need the challenge to write, think about, plan on what I can do better to draw closer to our main goal to establish Zion.

I find this subject is drawing more attention, for in each conference, I listen for and often hear reference to this subject from our leaders. It gives joy to my soul to hear it is a more common theme in these latter days.

Elder Holland said in 1985 that we should take every opportunity to learn, to dream dreams and see visions, and work toward their realization... Working toward establishing a Zion has always been my dream. Thus, as I start this new blog about realizing that dream or vision, I note it is "another" dream, but the same one I had before, and many others have.

So, I commit to strive to work toward that goal once again, that of establishing Zion.